What’s up?

A fearsome warrior
A fearsome warrior

Y’all, I’ve been meaning to update this blog more, but you know, life just has a way of getting in the way! First there was this new job, then a move, then, voila, I’m living in the Parallel Dimension of the Thumb People and battling genetically-enhanced Shih-Tzu warriors every day! Crazy, right?

So anyway, when I’m not on the lam I’ll be updating my blog again, as often as possible. Gotta go for now, a posse of Shih-Tzus was just spotted crossing the Plains of Peter, Paul and Mary on their draft llamas. F*ckers can move, too! TTFN!

Hi gang!

SOON
SOON

Wow, long time no blog, right? I’ve been meaning to get a post up here but you know how life gets in the way. Life, work, and the giant bunny head that hovers over me, in the night.

It says just one word, over and over, then I wake in the early pale blue light just before dawn, tasting Cadbury Cream and blood.

What is this. What is this.

Sometimes the darkness threatens to envelop and remove, leaving only a white petal strewn trail of blood and a voice echoing, off among the blooming trees, “Hoppin’ down the bunny trail, hippity-hoppity…”

Anyway, more soon!

SOON.

Hey y’all!

Wow, sorry I haven’t updated more often! Things have just been nutty around here, and my attention’s been scattered. First a mile-wide asteroid destroyed the closest nearby city, killing over 1 million and driving this hemisphere into a nuclear winter! Then I had a pretty bad hangnail. Also internet service is spotty. Anyway, don’t worry guys, totally updating more soon!

Hey guys!

Hey guys, sorry I haven’t updated in a while! Things have been crazy. First, I discovered I have a vestigial parasitic twin. I named him Rupert of the Ages, and he gradually took control of my mind, beginning with my base motor functions. Then he developed a form of telekinesis and began randomly murdering loud neighbors in unsettling ways. I got him to stop, but he pouted and threw tantrums by setting random fires in neighboring restrooms. We called it the Burned Junk Tour ’15! LOL. Anyways, I had a special form of neurosurgery that may have cut Rupert from his comfy spot in my corpus callosum, so now I’m in the process of recovering my basic motor skills! I’ll be back to regular blog posts and feeding myself with actual utensils real soon!