Another dumb workout post, wherein I shout out Fitness Blender, Again

I’ve posted this workout on my Tumblr¬†and given FitnessBlender.com–run by husband and wife Daniel and Kelli Segars–shout-outs there, too. There’s a reason: discovering the Segars’ thoughtfully made, carefully constructed workouts was crucial to getting me over a fitness hump.

I’d already lost a great deal of weight through running, diet, and some basic bodyweight workouts, but I think I was getting bored and needed to add variety. I also wanted to feel more fully fit, stronger in general. Somehow I became interested in kettlebells (wish I could remember what got me into them, but I can’t), and in researching the best workouts using those, I discovered this beginner kettlebell workout.

The straightforward and well-organized presentation had me hooked, and Fitness Blender videos became weekly components of my workouts, and remain so today. I’ve learned a ton from them, including proper form for stuff I already knew and a number of exercises I’d never even tried before. I also learned logical workout structure, which is pretty damned important if you want to make sure you’re doing a balanced routine.

I think one reason the Segars’ videos have become so popular (many of their workout videos have six-digit view numbers on Youtube) is because a huge number of people who run fitness websites and make such videos are coming from such an intensely aggressive, challenging, off-putting place, and Daniel and Kelli come across like trustworthy next door neighbors, people you’d invite over for a barbecue.

See, so many workout videos made by others are the same: heavy metal soundtracks blare while some bulked-out wannabe drill sergeant type whips out kettlebell snatches and then stares unblinking in the camera and bellowing about “PROTEIN” and “MASS” before flexing all the way down to their eyelids. Everything is BEAST MODE, all the time, and some of these Terminators even make it a point to note they’re doing this stuff drug (read: steroids)-free, when, funny enough, no one asked.

It’d be one thing if I was making fun of one such ‘guru,’ but the hilarious thing is I’m not. The majority of what you’ll encounter doing online research into fitness will resemble what I described. It could put someone who can’t afford (or like me, doesn’t really want) to join a gym off the whole thing. Fitness Blender works because the Segars(es?) know what they’re doing and seem adult enough and smart enough to lead you into new stuff without breaking your back or your spirit in the process.

I’m convinced that the last thing needed by many people who want to lose weight and get in shape is an approach that attempts to shame them. A terrible catch-22 of our society is just that–if you are very heavy, the moment you begin trying to make a change, you may become the butt of jokes and ridicule–even as you try. Even for trying. I don’t know why anyone in that position would want someone in their face aggressively challenging them for 30 minutes to an hour every other day. It ends up being motivation through resentment and anger–at the trainer and yourself–and I’m convinced that sort of motivation has a limited half-life.

(Steps carefully off soapbox, minding my form.)

Anyway–I did the workout in the video above today, but I had to make modifications, because I’m old (is my excuse). My changes are in parentheses. I used a single 45 lb. kettlebell for everything:

Brutal Kettlebell HIIT Cardio Tabata Workout

  • KB Halo
  • Mt Climbers
  • KB Snatch Right Arm
  • Squat Jacks (I hate these, but they’re great for your quads.)
  • KB Snatch Left Arm
  • Burpee (I admit it, I threw in a 1-minute break between this and the next set.)
  • KB Swing
  • Push Up (I did plenty of push-ups yesterday, so I took it easy with these and did two rounds of these with the easier style of push-up, done on knees instead of full-on plank.)
  • KB Goblet Squat
  • High Knees
  • KB Crush Curl (I just went ahead and did hammer curls with a pair of dumbbells, 25 lbs each.)
  • Jumping Lunges (These are really brutal, coming at this point in the workout. My thighs were burning.)

Fitness Blender estimates this workout may burn as many as 432 calories, and I believe it. In High Intensity Interval Training, intensity is the key word. Some people recommend you don’t do more than 3-4 HIIT workouts in a week, and I can say from experience that even 4 will mess with you, so tread lightly.

[Fitness Blender]

Daily Workout Post (that’s still not daily)

Since the first one went on a bit, let’s make today’s dumb workout post brief. I don’t pretend there’s any coherence to this one other than I’ve been in a day on/day off pattern and even though that’s 4 days a week, it feels like slacking, so I needed a whole body workout.

Part the First, in which our hero* addresses cardio, chest and arms:

  • Burpees x 5
  • Push-ups x 15
  • Burpees x 5
  • Arnolds” with 2 25-lb dumbbells, x 10. (Link goes to a video demonstration of “Arnolds,” which are, believe it or not, not named after that football-headed cartoon character, but the former governor of California, Arnold Schwarzenegger.)

I did four of each set in a circuit, for a total 40 burpees, 60 push-ups and 40 Arnolds. Or Ah-nulds, if you prefer the old hacky nod to the gov’s Austrian brogue.

Part the Second, in which our hero** addresses the need for an all-over body burn:

I did the workout above, as demonstrated by one of my favorite online fitness folks, Daniel, who runs the awesome FitnessBlender.com with his lovely wife, Kelli. In the interest of full disclosure, I used a single 53-lb kettlebell (I’ve switched between the 53 and a 70 before) and added a minute’s pause at the middle of the tape, figuring I began the thing already pretty sweaty and tired. I love this FitnessBlender workout in particular because it’s a time-saver and it hits all the good stuff.

Parts 1 and 2 together timed out to 30 minutes.

Plug I give every time I mention them–I can’t recommend Fitness Blender strongly enough if you, like me, have personal and budgetary constraints that make you wary of the gym. I prefer to run 2-5 times a week if I can but winter in New England can make that a tough sell–a resource like the one provided by these guys is invaluable in that situation, as well.

The usual disclaimer: I’m essentially using blog posts like this as notes for an ongoing project. This isn’t meant to be instructional and before you try any of it, you should eat a candy bar and think about your life and know that I’m just some Internet idiot, and I like to eat donut holes and drink scotch in addition to working out. I won’t claim to tell you what to do fitness-wise but I can totally instruct you on those things. (Hey, this whole blog warns you about the “unreliable narrator” part of this deal, sparky.)

For real education on these kinds of things, you should park yourself at FitnessBlender.com for a day and absorb their videos and plans like they’re your Jedis of gym stuff.

[Fitness Blender]

*Village idiot

**Middle-aged dipstick desperately fleeing the Reaper’s scythe